


The Summer of Heartaches

by thnksfrthklljs (nothingisreal)



Series: Doomed from the Start [1]
Category: Bandom, Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Anal Sex, Barebacking, Blow Jobs, M/M, Rimming, Summer of Like, Warped Tour 2005
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-26
Updated: 2016-05-26
Packaged: 2018-07-10 10:31:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6980692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nothingisreal/pseuds/thnksfrthklljs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pete was in love with Patrick probably from the very first time they met, even though it took him forever to admit it. He decided it'd be better never to confess the truth to Patrick, thus condemning himself to never being happy for the rest of his life. Or at least until Mikey Way came along...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Summer of Heartaches

**Author's Note:**

> No beta. English isn't my first language.  
> This is the longest thing I've ever written. The quality of my attention span is questionable at best. What I'm getting at is, I'm not used to writing anything longer than 4000 words, so it might be a bit raw.  
> Also, this is the first time I'm using American English, so sorry for any inaccuracies in grammar and vocabulary, or anything that seems too British. I did try not to use any British slang but I might have slipped, so sorry about that too.

Pete was familiar with My Chemical Romance, of course he was. He heard a couple of songs, read some articles, and maybe even happened to google Gerard Way more times than he cared to mention, but could anyone blame him? That guy really was something. He could sing (although nowhere near as good as Patrick if you asked Pete), he had some pretty impressive assets, and damn if he didn’t know how to use them. So yeah, Gerard Way just happened to be on Pete’s List of Guys He Might Want to Fuck, Provided He Ever Stops Being a Hopeless Sap For Patrick Stump.

Which was probably more impossible than a sudden invasion of body snatchers. Because Pete was head over heels in love possibly from the very first time he saw Patrick. Even if it took him ages to admit it. If he was to give a more exact date, it was probably when he was so depressed, he couldn’t even get out of bed without having to be physically forced to do so. It went on for a month before Patrick sat him down in Pete’s own kitchen, placed a plate full of mouthwateringly smelling steaming soup in front of him and threatened to confiscate his pills if he didn’t get a grip and start taking care of himself. Truth to be told, it was something Pete wasn’t very good at, to put it mildly, even when he wasn’t depressed. He would forget to eat and sleep, preferring to stay up all night, watching silly horror movies and writing angsty poems.

So yeah, Pete allowed himself to know that his affection went beyond simple platonic friendship but he wouldn’t even dream of telling anyone else, let alone Patrick. He might have been self destructive but that didn’t necessarily mean he had to sabotage the best relationship, the best fucking thing, that ever happened to him. So he went on pouring his soul out onto paper in form of messy lines written in half-sleep, which Patrick then somehow turned into some fucking beautiful songs. So you could probably say that Pete was indirectly pouring his soul out onto the audience, only through Patrick. It was intimate, that much wasn’t a surprise. What did shake Pete up at first was that he didn’t mind at all. Patrick was the only person Pete trusted enough to reveal all his secrets, most of them hidden behind words and masked as lyrics. Still, he was aware of the fact that Patrick was smart and knew him so well, he could see straight through all the bullshit Pete might throw his way.

But yeah, the point is, Pete knew My Chemical Romance quite well. To the point of jerking off over a certain frontman a couple of times. But he never put his mind to it to find out the names of other members. He was aware that one guitarist  was called Frank. And he had a vague image of the other one in his mind. Or at least his hair. Still, the rest of the band remained some kind of a mystery comparable to Bigfoot or the Loch Ness monster.

 

***

 

Pete was just putting a final touch on his eyeliner when Joe burst through the door, dragging behind him a very puzzled-looking guy.

“Look what I found,” Joe exclaimed proudly, pushing the guy to the center of the room. Noticing the blank stares the rest of his band was sending his way, he rolled his eyes, slinging his arm around the other guy’s shoulders. “Mikey Way,” he said, making a face as if the rest of them was retarded. “Of My Chemical Romance?” He added, smirking at them.

“No shit, we know _that_ ,” Pete answered putting the eyepencil down. “Mikey, how are you doing?” He smiled, extending his hand for Mikey to shake, “I’m Pete.”

“Yeah, I know,” Mikey answered as if it was obvious, his cheeks coloring almost immediately.

Pete was suddenly hit by a wave of fondness, usually reserved for Patrick. He shook his head and turned back to the mirror to sort his hair out.

“How are you doing?” Patrick asked, motioning for Mikey to sit next to him on the sofa, an invitation that was readily accepted.

Pete tuned out the conversation and soon enough there was a tech shoving his head in, announcing they’d be going on in five minutes.

That was right before Warped ‘04. During the summer, they didn’t see each other very often, the contact between the two bands restricted to saying ‘hi’ in passing and small talks when they happened to be in the same place.

Pete didn’t remember much of it. For the time being Mikey Way was degraded to a brief thought, because there were more important things for Pete to do than to worry about being maybe that little bit gayer than previously thought. It was around that time that he finally came to terms with his attraction to his lead singer. Not that he was ever _uncomfortable_ with it as such. But that didn’t mean he would just accept it straight away and carry on with his life.

 

***

 

It was very late. Or maybe very early, Pete couldn’t quite tell. Joe and Andy were both asleep in their bunks, so it was only him and Patrick still in the lounge. The light was off, because neither of them could be bothered to get up and switch it on. Besides, it was nice. Patrick was sitting in the middle of the couch, leaning back against it, playing absentmindedly with Pete’s hair, who had his head pillowed on Patrick’s lap. The TV was on, although neither of them was sure what movie was playing. Pete was in that weird… _transition phase_ \- dosing off, but still not asleep.

And in that moment it felt right to turn his head, so he could plant a kiss on Patrick’s palm. He heard a tired giggle somewhere above him and he smiled with satisfaction. Making Patrick laugh was his favorite pastime. He shifted in Patrick’s lap, so that he was facing the ceiling.

“I love you,” he muttered, just loud enough to be heard.

“I know,” Patrick answered, getting back to petting Pete’s head.

And Pete wanted to explain, so that Patrick would get it. And he probably would if it wasn’t for Joe stumbling into the lounge, not quite awake, mumbling curses and something about being _fucking thirsty, the damn hangover_. It burst the little bubble Pete created around himself and Patrick, brought him back to reality.

The next time he saw Mikey Way was less than a year later at Bamboozle in New Jersey. My Chemical Romance were set to play the day after Fall Out Boy, so Pete was surprised when Mikey walked into their dressing room, this time completely of his own free will.

“Hi,” he said, ducking his head, but Pete still could make out a faint smile. And although Mikey seemed to address nobody in particular, his eyes gave him away, when they lingered a second too long on Pete.

“Hi,” Pete answered, grinning. “What’s up?”

Mikey shrugged, shifting his weight to his other foot. “Thought I’d drop by. See you guys play.”

“Oh?” Pete  raised an eyebrow. “And what did you think?”

“It was pretty awesome,” Mikey chuckled. “You guys are great.”

“Thanks,” Patrick butted in before Pete could even open his mouth.

Pete narrowed his eyes at his best friend but then decided to let it go. Instead he took the opportunity to give Mikey a once-over without the risk of getting caught, as the latter was now focused on Patrick. Mikey was wearing tight jeans, which showed off his ass and a white denim jacket.

“You’re playing tomorrow, right?” Pete asked, kind of pointlessly as he already knew the answer but he needed to say _something_ or else he might have just started reciting poems about Mikey’s legs.

“Yeah,” Mikey said, smiling seemingly involuntarily. “You coming?”

Pete bit his lip to stop himself from saying something terribly inappropriate. “Sure,” he managed, giving Mikey a tight-lipped smile.

Pete did come to the concert the next day.  
And then the day after that he and Mikey went together to watch the other bands. Afterwards they ended up wandering the empty streets. Pete felt lost but Mikey seemed to be familiar enough with the place.

“You’re doing Warped again this year, aren’t you?” Pete asked, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

“Yeah,” Mikey answered giving Pete a sideways glance as if trying to assess something. “We’ll have to hang out more this time.”

Pete nodded eagerly, not even trying to hide his enthusiasm. “That’s what I was thinking,” he grinned.

“Well, here we are,” Mikey said, coming to a stop.

And yeah, come to think of it, Pete recognized the street his hotel was on.

“You coming in?” He asked, nodding up at the building towering above them. He was honestly surprised at the butterflies in his stomach. As if the question actually _meant_ something. Something more than Pete initially thought it did.

“Nah, thanks. I should head back. It’s me and Gee’s movie night. And it’s his turn to choose what we’re watching, so he might kill me if I don’t show up.”

Pete took in the way Mikey’s eyes shone as he spoke about his brother and the way his lips curled up on their own accord. And suddenly he was overcome with the urge to kiss that smile right off Mikey’s face until Pete was the one on his mind. Until he could be the reason behind such a smile.

Not that he wanted to compete with Gerard, that’d be a suicide. Pete didn’t need telling that what Mikey and Gerard had was special and sacred. Anybody who ever saw them interact would know that unless they were an idiot. And he wasn’t jealous. He just wished that maybe someday, Mikey would get that soft look on his face while thinking about Pete.

“See you tomorrow?”

“Huh?” Pete replied dumbly, still engrossed in his thoughts. “Oh yeah! Sure, Mikey.”

He didn’t lean in and kiss the other man, but it was a close call.

“What’re you grinning about?” was the first thing a very grumpy Patrick mumbled from beneath the covers, only the top of his head and eyes sticking out.

“I’m just happy,” Pete replied, toeing off his shoes and kicking them across the room.

Patrick snickered, lowering the covers, so that now his whole head was visible. “You’re never _just_ happy.”  
Pete paused with his T-shirt halfway off. “Good point,” he admitted eventually, throwing his jeans in the general direction of his suitcase. He put on a clean T-shirt and made his way over to where Patrick was shivering slightly. “I am now though,” he said.

Pete raised the covers, ignoring Patrick’s unhappy whine at the gust of cold air, and slid in next to him. He maneuvered them both, so that Patrick had his head pillowed on Pete’s chest, right over his heart.

Patrick _tried_ to pretend he thought Pete was a nuisance but he couldn’t help the content smile. In the end he gave up all pretenses and just slung an arm around Pete’s waist, snuggling closer.

“Well, what was it that made you so happy?” He asked and Pete could tell that he was genuinely interested.

Pete mentally weighed the pros and cons of talking to your best friend, who you just happened to be in love with, about another almost-a-friend-although-they-just-met-a-couple-of-times-might-be-a-crush. He came to the conclusion that he could give away _some_ information.

He settled for, “Mikey Way. He’s pretty cool. My Chem is going on Warped Tour this year.”

Patrick made a noise that Pete guessed was meant to show his agreement. “They’re all ‘pretty cool’.”

“Yeah,” Pete sighed. “Guess they are.”

Next day, Pete went downstairs in the morning, only to find Mikey already waiting for him.

“Wanna go to the movies?” Mikey asked as soon as Pete was within the earshot.

Pete shrugged, a smile slowly creeping onto his face, replacing the stunned expression he was wearing. “Sure,” he replied.

“Well, come on then,” Mikey laughed, grabbing Pete’s hand to lead him outside, and Pete refused to acknowledge the way his heart skipped a beat.

God, it all felt too much like cheating, what with Mikey’s hand interlocked with Pete’s, and Patrick’s smell rubbed-off on Pete’s T-shirt, his side still warm, where Patrick had been snuggling into him.

Pete knew that technically it didn’t count as cheating. After all he had no one to cheat _on_. But it still made him slightly nauseous with uneasy, everything coming too close to betrayal in his mind.

Pete honestly couldn’t remember what movie they saw. He was too busy having an internal freakout. He was in love with Patrick. He could accept that much. After all, Patrick was his best friend and Pete wasn’t exactly known for his ability to distance himself and regulate his emotions. So falling in love with Patrick wasn’t that much of a surprise if you thought about it. Mikey on the other hand…

Mikey was something else entirely. Pete could come to terms with liking a guy. Fuck, he could even come to terms with being gay if need be. But the point was, he honestly believed he wasn’t. He could tell when a guy was attractive, he even made out with some. And he sometimes whacked off fantasising about blokes, Gerard Way being the perfect example. But he knew that if anybody, who didn’t fit the description of a girl tried to venture into his pants region, he’d put a stop to it.

So the problem with Mikey didn’t stem from the fact that he was undoubtedly a guy. It stem from the fact that he was undoubtedly a guy, whom Pete would blow more than happily. And not only in his head while jerking off. He actually had to grasp the armrests at the cinema so tight, his knuckles turned white to stop himself from sinking to his knees and doing something that certainly counted as public offence. Not to mention might have earned him a punch in the nose.

So yes, Pete felt excused for not paying any attention to the movie. On the way to Pete’s hotel, they exchanged numbers and then Pete locked himself in the bathroom, shoved his now uncomfortable jeans down his legs and gripped his cock firmly. It took him all of a minute to come with the image of sucking Mikey off in the middle of a cinema in his mind.

They didn’t see each other until summer. In the meantime they texted ever so often, Pete managing to calm himself down when he didn’t have to see Mikey in person almost daily.

Then came the Warped Tour ‘05.

 

***

 

“I’m telling you, it’s true,” Mikey argued fiercely.

“Mikey, I’d have to be drunk to the point of passing out to even _consider_ believing you,” Frank bit back quickly.

“Believe what?” Asked Gerard, throwing himself onto the couch, next to Pete. And, hello, maybe Pete wasn’t the only one, who sometimes let the concept of personal space escape him.

“He refuses to believe that Sue Parkins once blew me in the bathroom after classes.”

“I’d faster accept Santa Clause climbing down my chimney in the middle of the night.”

“Hey!” Pete protested. “Santa Clause totally exists.”

Gerard snickered beside him. “I’m with you on that one, actually,” he told Pete.

Frank facepalmed himself, “where did my life go wrong?”

“Said the guy arguing about whether Sue something or other blew my brother some eight years ago.”

Frank opened his mouth, closed it, then opened again. “I hate you,” he announced, crossing his arms and dropping down onto the armchair.

“Yay!” Mikey exclaimed, raising his arms above his head, which made his T-shirt ride up, showing off his middle. Not that Pete was looking. “You’re the best brother in the world,” he laughed, throwing himself into Gerard’s lap. Which, considering the latter’s proximity to Pete, meant he was also half sitting in Pete’s lap.

“Of course I am,” Gerard replied, wrapping his arms around Mikey’s middle. “Ouch! Frank, stop kicking me.”

“You deserved it,” Frank replied from his armchair, sticking his tongue out. “I want an apology,” he added as an afterthought.

“I’m sorry?” Gerard offered.

“No, you dumbass. First of all, you so aren’t. And second, I meant a _proper_ apology,” he said with a smirk.

Gerard licked his lips and raised an eyebrow, prompting Mikey to make a gagging noise.

“I take back what I said,” he muttered with a frown. “Pete?”

“Yeah?”

“I think it’s our cue to leave,” Mikey nodded at his brother and Frank. “I really don’t wanna see  _that_.”

Pete was going to say that he wouldn’t mind but then thought better of it.

“Let’s go then,” he smiled, grabbing Mikey’s wrist and dragging him outside.

It was just beginning to get dark, the sun low on the horizon. ‘Romantic,’ Pete thought, quickly shaking it off.

“Where do you wanna go?”

Mikey shrugged and Pete realized he never let go of his wrist. Mikey didn’t seem to mind, interlocking their fingers and making Pete’s stomach drop.

“Let’s go for a walk.”

They ended up sitting down on the grass, some distance from all the buses, and people, and noise.

“It’s nice,” Mikey said, lying down, putting one arm behind his head, the other reaching for Pete to make him lie down too.

Pete complied, humming in the back of his throat to show he agreed.

He wasn’t quite sure, when they went back to holding hands, or when Mikey started rubbing circles on Pete’s hip, but it was nice, so he didn’t say anything.

They were quiet for so long, the sun disappeared, and moon was high up in the sky before Mikey broke the silence.

“You got a girlfriend?”

Pete almost swallowed his own tongue. He resisted the urge to pinch himself and check he wasn’t dreaming it.

“Wha’?” He gasped after a very long time.

Pete felt Mikey’s body shake with silent laughter. Mikey rolled onto his side, propping his head on his hand, the one that wasn’t busy _still stroking Pete’s fucking hip_. “I asked,” he said slowly and Pete would swear he moved in closer, “if you have a girlfriend.”

Pete blinked at the stars above him half-expecting UFO to appear and admit they abducted the real Mikey and replaced him with one of their kind. Suddenly, his theory about body snatchers seemed much more possible.

“No,” he managed to get out, after he remembered that Mikey asked him a question in the first place. “I don’t.”

“Good,” Mikey smiled like the cat that got the cream.

Pete would remind himself not to get his hopes up but Mikey didn’t give him enough time for that. Because he was leaning in. And Pete forgot to breathe.

Their first kiss certainly felt like a first. It was tentative and careful as if Mikey was worried Pete might bolt. Pete would worry about it too if he had enough brain power left for it. All he seemed capable of thinking in that moment was ‘we’re kissing and it’s perfect’.

He expected to feel guilty. To want to disappear from the face of the Earth, because it wasn’t okay to kiss Mikey, when he was so obviously in love with Patrick. But the guilt never came. Quite the opposite, actually. He was happy. _Really_ happy and not just feeling as if his blood turned into coffee overnight. And it was Mikey making him feel that way.

He wanted to laugh, so he did.

“What’s so funny?” Mikey asked, lying half on top of Pete.

“I’m happy,” Pete replied truthfully.

He looked at the boy on top of him and was overcome with the sudden urge to kiss him. ‘I can do that now,’ he thought.

And just like that, they were kissing again, not quite as gently or softly. Pete had his hand twisted in Mikey’s T-shirt, the other flat on his lower back, where his clothes were riding up. Mikey was licking at his bottom lip, coaxing him to open his mouth and when he did, he thought that maybe he died and by some colossal misunderstanding ended up in Heaven.

That night, he couldn’t sleep again. Only this time, he felt good about it. His head was full of Mikey - his smile, his eyes, the way he walked Pete back to the FOB bus and gave him a goodbye kiss. And who was to say, Pete was only allowed to want Patrick and no one else? It wasn’t as if he would have to be stuck being hopelessly in love with someone, who thought of him in best-friends-terms only.

Don’t get him wrong. He adored Patrick with all his flaws and shortcomings. And the fact that the kid was his best friend still blew his mind. But that didn’t mean  he was going to spend the rest of his life moping about, hoping for the impossible. Patrick wasn’t in love with him and, despite everything the papers said, Pete wasn’t enough of a selfish bastard to force him into anything.

From then on, it was MikeyandPete. Inseparable. They would joke and make out and play video games. And it was fucking perfect. So perfect in fact that Pete couldn’t help and wonder when it would all blow up in his face. But days went by and everything seemed to be well.

 

***

 

It was the fourth of July. Most of the guys were outside, watching fireworks. Everyone actually. Save for Pete and Mikey that is.

They were squeezed together in Pete’s bunk, talking about everything and nothing one moment, and then the next Pete found himself straddling Mikey and kissing him passionately. That much was normal. They often made out in the bunk area until they were both breathless and hard in their pants. But there were never any orgasms involved. Usually it ended with them parting ways and jerking off in their respective bunks.

But something felt different. Pete couldn’t explain it, not even with metaphors, which always seemed to fill his head. Certainly not with mere words. But there was a shift in the atmosphere. As if the air suddenly thickened around them.

“Pete,” Mikey gasped, when Pete moved on top of him, accidentally rubbing their crotches together.

“Are we really doing this?” Pete asked, even as Mikey was tugging at his T-shirt impatiently.

“Get this thing off,” he muttered against Pete’s neck. “Don’t you want us to?” His tone was teasing, but Pete knew that if he asked, Mikey would stop at any point and never mention it again.

Maybe it was that sense of safety that made him shake his head, whispering “I do” feverently over and over again. Or maybe it was the image of Mikey, coming undone beneath him. Whatever it was, it made him stop thinking and start doing.

He sat back on his heels, still straddling Mikey, careful not to bang his head against the top of the bunk and quickly pulled his T-shirt off. Mikey seized the opportunity to get rid of Pete’s belt and unzip his jeans.

“Fuck,” Pete mumbled, watching Mikey’s hands pull his pants down his legs.

“Come on,” Mikey encouraged, when Pete failed to move a muscle, transfixed on the way Mikey’s T-shirt was riding up _again_ , all the way up to his chest. “Take them off.”

“You too,” he demanded, even as he was getting out off the bunk, so he could easily get rid of his pants. He paused for a second, biting his lip and wondering whether he should take off his underwear as well.

Soon enough, he was back in the bunk, next to Mikey, who was naked as welll and pushing on Pete’s chest.

“Lay down.” He had to repeat a couple of times, because Pete’s brain seemed to have short circuited. But it honestly wasn’t his fault, because _Mikey+naked=fuckinhotneedtotouchnow_.

They shifted, so that Pete was lying on his back with Mikey hovering above him.

“Alright?”

Pete nodded his head, hands cupping Mikey’s face and kissing him softly.

When they broke apart, Pete took Mikey’s glasses off, placing them on the bunk. Mikey hummed in appreciation and leant back down. This time the kiss was hotter and messier, their lust showing through. Mikey unconsciously rocked his hips down and Pete gasped, his hands flying down to Mikey’s ass.

“Please?” He asked, leaning his forehead against Mikey’s.

“What do you want?” Mikey asked and Pete shivered, because his voice was fucking hot, all deep and filled with something Pete couldn’t quite place in that moment but it made his skin prickle pleasantly.

“You,” he whispered.

Mikey hummed, kissing Pete quickly and rocking his hips down once, before he raised himself onto all fours , his mouth moving down Pete’s neck. He paused at Pete’s nipples, biting them gently, circling them with his tongue until Pete was reduced to a writhing mess beneath him.

“Mikey,” he moaned when Mikey licked around his navel. He had a feeling he knew where this was going and his whole body was tense with anticipation.

Mikey bit at his hipbone before soothing it with his tongue. When he started sucking at the skin there, intent on leaving a mark, Pete bucked his hips and moaned in frustration when he found nothing but air.

“Impatient,” Mikey smirked from where he was nestled between Pete’s thighs. He move them further apart, leaving his hands there, his grip tight enough to bruise.

Pete groaned at the thought.

He felt hot and frustrated, because Mikey suddenly just stopped and stared.

“Mikey,” Pete whined, hiding his face in the pillow. He felt exposed and vulnerable and he wasn’t prepared for how much that would turn him on. “Do you want me to beg?” He asked.

“Maybe next time,” Mikey replied and Pete smiled, because there would be a next time.

But then the smile was wiped straight off his face, as Mikey leaned in and licked his cock without any warning.

“Fuck!” Pete exclaimed.

“I haven’t done anything yet,” Mikey protested.

Pete wanted to scream, when instead of continuing with what he was doing, Mikey started leaving hickeys on his thighs. It felt great, but Pete was too far-gone to care. He needed Mikey to stop teasing and do _something_ , so he told him that.

“Sorry,” he said, his tone giving away that he was not sorry at all. “But you’re so hot like this.”

Pete moaned quietly, because Mikey just called him hot, then again - louder - when Mikey wrapped his lips around the head of his cock and licked around the tip.

“That’s so good,” Pete mumbled when he mastered enough courage to look down.

Mikey looked up at him through his eyelashes, lips stretched around Pete’s dick. He slid down, his eyes never leaving Pete’s. And then kept going until his nose was almost touching Pete’s stomach and Pete felt himself hit the back of his throat.

“Oh my God,” Pete said breathily.

Mikey pulled back, licking Pete’s cock as he went.

“Good?” He asked leaning down to give Pete’s balls some attention.

“Fucking perfect.”

Mikey grinned and then Pete was watching his own prick disappearing between Mikey’s pretty lips again.

“Close,” he gasped when Mikey built up a steady rhythm, one hand reaching down between Pete’s legs to massage his balls. He knew he wouldn't last much longer, but he honestly couldn't bring himself to care. Especially when Mikey started humming around his length.

At that point, Pete was chanting his name, mixed in with curses and incoherent moans.

Then the hand rubbing Pete’s balls reached further down to circle his hole and he was _gone_.

“Gonna,” was all he managed before he was cumming. And Mikey didn’t even try to pull back, he just carried on rubbing Pete’s cock with his tongue before he was completely spent.

Then he came up Pete’s body, mouth empty, some of Pete’s seed on his chin and Pete felt his dick twitch weakly.

He felt tired and content. All he wanted was to curl up around Mikey and go to sleep.

But Mikey was still hard against Pete’s thigh and Pete needed to _touch_. “Lay back,” he said and Mikey complied almost immediately. Pete straddled his thighs, wrapping his hand around Mikey’s erection and tugging gently. He was just starting to get into the rhythm of it, when Mikey bucked against him, head thrown back, a steady stream of curses spilling from his lips, and came all over Pete’s fist.

They must have dozed off, because the next thing Pete knew, there was shuffling on the other side of the curtain that sounded like someone was looking for something. Pete lay there for a moment longer, before sticking his hand out, patting the floor in search of his clothes.

He tugged them on, not bothering with underwear and got out of the bunk.

What greeted him was the sight of his best friend’s backside.

“Lovely, Trick,” he chuckled.

Patrick turned around so quickly, he stumbled backwards and fell into his own bunk.

“Ouch,” he muttered, his face reminding Pete of a small puppy, reaching beneath himself and coming up with a phone. “Oh, there it is,” he exclaimed, eyes lightening up. “I’ve been looking for it for ages.”

“See?” Pete asked teasingly, offering Patrick a hand, which he readily accepted. “You would’ve never found it without my help.”

Patrick rolled his eyes, but there was smile on his face. “Yeah, sure. If by help you mean making me fall on my butt.”

“Let me tell you, it’s a very nice butt,” Pete winked.

“You’re unbearable,” Patrick shook his head.

“You love me,” countered Pete, grinning brightly at Patrick.

Pete counted it as a win, when Patrick chuckled.

“Alright, alright,” he nodded, putting his hands up in defeat.

They fell silent for a few long minutes and Patrick seemed to be engrossed in his thought.

“Could we talk about… something?” Patrick asked, biting his lip and looking at Pete uncertainly. The sudden shift in mood had Pete doing a double take.

Pete darted his eyes in the direction of his bunk. “Eh…” but before he could say anything else, the curtain was pulled back and a very sleepy, but fully-clothed, Mikey was getting out.

“Oh, I see,” mumbled Patrick at the same time Mikey said ‘hi’. “Well then, guess I’ll give you guys some privacy.”

“No worries,” smiled Mikey, tugging on his shoes. “I was just going. Got a text from Gerard.”

“We’ve gotta repeat it sometime,” he whispered in Pete’s ear. And then he was off, but not before he could lean in and plant a kiss on Pete’s cheek, making him go red. Or at least as red as his complexion would allow.

He turned back to Patrick, who was biting his lip in what Pete recognized as anxiety.

“Everything alright? Pete asked absentmindedly, his mind busy playing back Mikey’s words.

Patrick shrugged in response, “I’ll be fine.” His tone told Pete it was better to leave it, at least for the time being.

“So,” Pete started, throwing himself down onto Patrick’s bunk and patting the mattress beside him, “what was it you wanted to talk about?”

Patrick hesitated for a second before flopping down beside Pete. He shrugged, still looking miserable. “Doesn’t matter now,” he mumbled, staring at the floor.

“You sure?” Pete asked, furrowing his brows. Patrick was behaving… strangely.

“Yeah,” Patrick sighed, squeezing his own thighs.

“You know you can talk to me about anything, right?” Pete put a hand on Patrick’s back jerking it back immediately when Patrick flinched at the contact. “Trick…”

“I’m tired.”

“But…”

“Just leave it, okay?” Patrick snapped, making Pete flinch.

Pete could tell this conversation was going nowhere. It’d be best to end it now, before they decided to kill each other. “You want me to stay here?”

He was expecting it but the determined “no” still felt like a punch in the gut.

“Alright then.”

Pete could probably go out, it was pretty early, but he honestly didn’t feel like it. Instead he squeezed himself into his bunk and closed the curtain.

 

**10:13 pm**

**To: mikeyway**

**whts up?**

 

**10:14 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**You saw me like 5 minutes ago.**

 

**10:14 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**Hanging out with Gee.**

 

**10:15 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**What’s wrong?**

 

**10:16 pm**

**To:mikeyway**

**thnk i had n argmnt w/ trick**

 

**10:18 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**What do you mean you think? How can you not know?**

 

**10:20 pm**

**To: mikeyway**

**he wasnt v clear abt it**

 

**10:21 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**I can’t believe you two sometimes.**

 

**10:22 pm**

**To: mikeyway**

**but idek why hes pssd at me :(**

 

**10:24 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**Maybe he’s having a bad day.**

 

**10:24 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**You want me to come over?**

 

Pete wanted nothing more than for Mikey to come over and cheer him up - maybe excluding some nice snuggling with Patrick to cheer _both of them_ up - but he forced himself to stop and think about it - really think about it, eyes fixed on the curtain as if he could see Patrick in his own bunk across the aisle if he tried hard enough - before sighing in resignation.

 

**10:19 pm**

**To: mikeyway**

**ill see you tomorrow**

 

He typed quickly, throwing his phone away before he could change his mind. Patrick seemed pretty upset and Pete really didn’t want to make him feel worse. If he said he needed some rest, Pete wasn't going to deny him that.

Come to think of it, it wasn’t as if Pete could ever deny him anything…

 

***

 

The next week passed with Patrick avoiding him shamelessly, not even trying to pretend he wasn’t. The worst part was, Pete had no idea what he did to deserve it. There was no argument to speak of, other than that weird not-quite-a-squabble, Pete was on his best behavior, and, as far as he could tell, Patrick was pretty happy all the way up to the point, when he suddenly wasn’t.

“What’s the deal with you two?” Mikey asked finally one night. The MCR bus was empty, save for the two of them, but they still confined themselves to Mikey’s bunk. They didn’t have sex since that first time, but it _was_ a pretty crazy week. At least Mikey wasn’t leaving the room as soon as he caught a glimpse of Pete, unlike some other people.

“I’ll be damned if I know,” Pete frowned, moving closer to Mikey until he could use his chest as a pillow.

Mikey had his hand on Pete’s head, playing with his hair and it was so soothing, Pete forgot to tense up at the next statement.

“Maybe he’s jealous.”

Between Mikey’s fingers in his hair and his heartbeat loud in Pete’s ear, it took him a damn long time to process the meaning behind it.

“Wha’...?” he asked, wrinkling his nose. “That’s dumb. Patrick knows we’re best friends. He’s got no reason to be jealous.”

Pete felt it more than heard when Mikey chuckled. “Have you ever thought that maybe he wants you to be more than that?”

Pete nodded his head against Mikey’s chest, before his brain caught up with him and he started shaking it frantically instead.

“Wait, what?” He rolled over, so that he was lying on top of Mikey, resting his chin on Mikey’s collarbone. “Well... yeah, there are a couple of points which deem your theory wrong.”

Mikey raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything, which Pete took as his cue to go on.

“Number one: he’s probably straight. Number two: he’s not in love with me. Number three: our relationship is strictly platonic.”

“Alright,” Mikey said slowly. “These are all sound arguments when you look at them this way.”

“But…?”

Mikey smiled at him softly, wrapping his arms around Pete’s waist. “But there’s one tiny but extremely  important detail.”

“Oh?” Pete raised an eyebrow, propping himself up on his elbows, so he could study Mikey’s face. “Which is?”

“Pete, you can be dumb sometimes.” Mikey leant in, planting a brief kiss on his lips to keep him quiet, “I’m not putting you down,” he added quickly.

Pete hummed noncommittally. “Are you going to tell me what that point is?”

“Have you ever seen the way he looks at you?”

 

***

 

Three days later and Pete still couldn’t get over what Mikey told him. They were on their way to a hotel, each in their own bus.

 

**5:32 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**Talked to him yet?**

 

Pete would have done that. He missed Patrick liked crazy and he wanted to get everything straight, so that he could have him back. The problem was that as soon as the door closed behind Andy, who was the last one on the bus, Patrick disappeared in his bunk and didn’t come out since.

 

**5:34 pm**

**To: mikeyway**

**u r a shitty bf. r u trng to gt rid of me alrd?**

 

**5:34 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**IDK I was your bf**

 

Pete actually facepalmed himself, which earned him weird looks from Andy and Joe.

Then before he could start freaking out:

 

**5:35 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**I like it.**

 

**5:36 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**CU in my room l8r tonight?**

 

Pete went from wishing the ground would just open and swallow him up to grinning like an idiot in 0.5 seconds flat.

“What’re you up to, Wentz?” Andy was studying him from where he and Joe were sitting on the floor, playing war.

“What are your plans for tonight?” He asked innocently.

“Nobody ever told you that you can’t answer a question with a question?” Andy corrected him, shooting Joe a hurt look when the latter beat his King with an Ace.

“You do realize you just did what you said you shouldn’t do, right?” Joe asked, grinning widely at Andy’s slightly pissed expression.

“So?” prompted Pete.

“We’ll probably play video games and watch some movies. Why?” He asked, narrowing his eyes at Pete suspiciously.

“You see, what I’m up to is, while you’ll be doing some typical boring stuff, I’ll be scoring somewhere down the hall,” Pete grinned at the horror plain on Andy’s face.

“Oh my God!” Andy cringed at the same time that Joe threw his hands up in the air, making his cards fly in all direction and shouted, “spare us the details!”

 

**5:37 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**Srsly tho, have u?**

**5:43 pm**

**To: mikeyway**

**I rlly wnt to tlk to him. The prblm is rn it wld b more of a monologue.**

 

**5:45 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**Monologue must be the longest word you ever texted in its entirety.**

 

**5:45 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**Why?**

 

**5:46 pm**

**To: mikeyway**

**he‘s in his bnk**

 

**5:48 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**Then grow a pair and fucking TALK TO HIM!!!**

 

Pete pocketed his phone, sitting up straight.

“Hey, guys, mind if I join you?”

 

***

 

**7:12 pm**

**From: mikeyway**

**Room 101. Just drop by whenever ;)**

 

Pete was sharing with Patrick. Who seemed to have disappeared once again.

Pete decided not to think about it. He left his bags on one of the beds and went to take a shower. When he came out there still was no sign of Patrick, so Pete decided ‘fuck it all!’

 

**7:27 pm**

**To: Trick XO**

**u can acc slp in ‘our’ rm, i wont be thr, so dwai**

 

He hit sent, checking the number on the door he was passing.

97… 99…

101.

Pete took a deep breath and knocked three times.

“It’s open!”

Gerard looked up from his sketchbook. “Oh, hi there, Pete,” he smiled, crawling out from under the covers and leaning over to find his jeans. “Mikey’s in the shower,” he explained.

He zipped up his fly and patted the mattress in front of him. Pete sat down, kicking off his shoes.

“Am I supposed to feel anxious and suspicious of what you’re up to? Because I kinda am.”

Gerard seemed to consider it for a moment, “you probably should, yeah,” he said, grinning.

“The point is, I haven’t given you my big brother talk yet.”

“Oh God,” Pete exclaimed, falling back onto the covers and hiding his face in his hands. “Is this really necessary?”

“Yep,” Gerard laughed, popping the ‘p’. “So, you know the score. You break his heart, I break your bones, etc.”

Pete raised his head to give him an incredulous look.

“Alright,” Gerard said slowly, “let me rephrase that then. You break his heart, I get Bob to break your bones.”

“Now, you see, that actually sounded scary,” Pete congratulated him. “And if _he_ breaks _my_ heart?”

Gerard bit his lip, in deep thought. “Then feel free to come and cry on my shoulder,” he grinned. “I’ve been feeling underappreciated by Frank lately.”

They looked at each other and started laughing.

And that was exactly how Mikey found them. He raised an eyebrow and probably shrugged mentally.

“I don’t wanna know?”

They both shook their heads.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” He closed the bathroom door, walked across the room to where Pete and Gerard were still shaking, trying (futilely) to suppress their giggles, and threw himself onto the bed.

“I’ll be at Frank’s,” Gerard said, a chuckle escaping him. “Have fun,” he grinned at them, pulling on his sneakers.

“That’s not what you’re supposed to say,” Mikey protested, sitting on his heels.

Gerard paused with his hand on the door handle. “Oh, you’re right.” He brought his hand up, ready to count it out. “Be safe. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. Oh, and remember that too much lube is almost enough. Did I miss something?”

Mikey shook his head. “No, you’re good. Have fun.”

“What about the rest?” Gerard frowned.

“ _You’re_ the older brother,” Mikey said, sticking out his tongue.

“True, I forgot. See you in the morning. Love ya.”

And with that the door shut behind him. On his way out, Gerard flicked the switch, so that the only source of light in the room was now a small bedside lamp.

“What?” Mikey asked when he noticed the look Pete was giving him.

“Are you guys for real?” Pete laughed.

“We’re close,” Mikey shrugged, grinning.

“I can see that.”

“You didn’t, did you?” Mikey rapidly changed the subject.

Pete knew immediately what he meant, but decided to play dumb in hopes it would buy him some time. “I didn’t what?”

Mikey rolled his eyes. “You know what I mean. Did you talk to Patrick?”

“Do we have to talk about it?” Pete asked, resisting the urge to cross his arms in front of his chest.

“We really do.”

Nobody spoke for a minute before Pete sighed in defeat.

“Alright,” he agreed, moving in closer. “We will. Later?” He asked pleadingly, tugging at the hem of Mikey’s T-shirt.

“Later - when?”

“Later - afterwards?” Pete licked his lips, gently taking Mikey’s glasses off and placing them on the nightstand.

“Yeah,” Mikey agreed, suddenly out of breath. “Yeah, that sounds… good.”

Pete pushed Mikey’s T-shirt up his chest, before Mikey got the cue and raised his arms. Mikey wrapped one arm around Pete’s waist and lay down, pulling Pete on top of him.

“Okay?” Pete whispered, pushing hair out of Mikey’s face tenderly before leaning in to kiss him softly.

“Perfect,” Mikey smiled.

They did it before. But somehow this was so completely different. Maybe it was the big bed instead of a cramped bunk. Or maybe the privacy they could only dream of on a bus shared by four/five guys. Or maybe it was how all of Pete’s senses seemed to be attuned to Mikey in that moment.

Before, it was all lust and horniness, the days, maybe even weeks without as much as a couple of minutes to jerk off getting to them. There was only one goal and it was to come. It made everything feel rushed and made Pete think of dogs in heat.

But now they didn’t have to worry about somebody walking in. They had all the time in the world. And Pete was going to make good use of it.

He kissed Mikey again. Deeper this time, but he made sure to keep it slow and tender. He heard Mikey’s breathing pick up, his hands rubbing Pete’s back, slipping under his shirt.

He planted a kiss in the corner of Mikey’s mouth before moving lower. He licked his way down the side of Mikey’s neck, making him gasp, and nipped at the place his neck met his shoulder. Satisfied that there would be a mark, he moved onto Mikey’s nipples, licking at them, which earned him a loud moan.

“You like it?” He asked, darting his eyes towards Mikey’s face.

“Yeah.”  
Pete hummed and bit down gently, causing Mikey to thrust his hips upwards.

“Easy,” he mumbled against Mikey’s skin. “We don’t wanna rush anything.”

He placed wet, opened mouth kisses down the middle of Mikey’s chest, stopping only when he came to the elastic of his boxers.

Mikey was tugging at his T-shirt impatiently. “Pete,” he whined.

“Yeah?”

“Too many fucking clothes,” he said grumpily and giggled immediately afterwards.

Pete sat back to pull off his T-shirt.

“These too,” Mikey demanded, hooking his fingers in the belt loops of Pete’s jeans.

Mikey watched him hungrily, biting his lip, as Pete unzipped his jeans and pushed them down his thighs with his boxers.

His cock twitched when Mikey looked him up and down and licked his lips.

“Fuck,” Pete muttered, holding himself up on his hands and knees above Mikey. He raised one hand to Mikey’s face, ran his fingers along Mikey’s bottom lip, moaning when Mikey licked them before taking them into his mouth, swirling his tongue around them and sucking.

“Fuck,” Pete repeated. “Do you know what you’re doing to me?”

Mikey let Pete’s fingers slip out of his mouth, not even giving Pete enough time to feel bad about it. “You could show me,” Mikey suggested and Pete had to close his eyes against the surge of want.

He kneeled long enough to pull Mikey’s boxers down and then they were both naked, lying on their sides facing each other.

Pete run his fingers down the side of Mikey’s face. “Beautiful.”

Mikey turned his head and kissed Pete’s palm. Then he moved closer, entangling their legs and making their bodies touch from chests all the way down to their legs.

“Mikeyway,” Pete whispered, mouthing at Mikey’s cheek, “I think I’m falling for you.”

And it was complete, unadulterated true. Pete suddenly realized that he could readily forget about Patrick (romantically speaking) under the promise that he could spend the rest of his life doing this.

“I already fell for you a long time ago,” Mikey whispered back and Pete’s heart skipped a beat.

They kissed again, their bodies moving together.

“Mikey,” Pete gasped.

“Come on,” Mikey said, turning over so that he was once again on his back. He spread his thighs and tugged at Pete’s wrist, “on top of me.”

Pete complied immediately, making himself comfortable between Mikey’s legs, Mikey’s cock against his stomach.

“Want me to repay the favor?” He asked, nosing at Mikey’s collarbone.

Mikey shook his head. “Not now. I’d rather have you inside me.”

At that Pete had to close his eyes and take measured breaths, because he was afraid he might cum just from Mikey’s words.

“You sure?” He asked after he managed to get _some_ of his composure back.

Mikey nodded his head eagerly. “Been thinking about that,” he confessed, rubbing the back of Pete’s thigh.

Pete just _had to_ kiss him in that moment or else he might have died.

“Lube?” He muttered against Mikey’s lips.

“Top drawer.”

“Condom?” Pete asked after he failed to find any in the nightstand.

“Don’t bother,” Mikey answered, mouthing at his hip which was the only part of Pete he could comfortably reach in the position they were in.

Pete’s brain seriously short circuited in that moment. “Wha’?” He asked, letting Mikey pull him back down on top of him.

“I said ‘don’t bother’,”  Mikey repeated. “Unless you want one, in which case there are some in my suitcase.”

“I heard you,” Pete said absent-mindedly.

“But if it’s all the same to you, I’d rather you didn’t use it.”

“You want me to bareback you?” Pete said slowly.

“Yeah, that’s it,” Mikey agreed.

“Right.”

He remembered the lube in his hand and sat back on his heels. Before he could unscrew it, Mikey took the bottle from him and poured some onto his palm. Pete hissed when Mikey encircled his cock loosely, pumping slowly.

“Don’t you want me to prepare you?” Pete asked when he noticed Mikey placing the bottle on the nightstand.

“Took care of that in the shower.”

“Are you trying to kill me here?” Pete asked weakly, the image of Mikey fingering himself popping into his mind. “Is there something else I should know?”

“Nope,” Mikey chuckled. “Pretty sure that’s all.”

“How do you want it?” Pete asked, leaning down to kiss Mikey.

“Like this is perfect,” Mikey answered, wrapping an arm around Pete’s neck and bringing him in closer.

Pete shifted around a bit, holding Mikey’s legs up and apart.

“Ready?” Pete asked, leaning down to kiss Mikey once more.

“Go on,” Mikey smiled, spreading his hands on Pete’s stomach.

Pete used his hand to position his erection at Mikey’s entrance and pushed in.

Mikey wasn’t lying when he said he was prepared, his body opening up around Pete eagerly. It was one long, smooth slide and then he bottomed out, his mouth hanging open. He paused, letting Mikey get used to having him inside, while Pete tried to focus on something else besides for _hotwettightfuck_. It was made hundred times better by the fact that it was Mikey clenching around him and making almost inaudible little noises.

Pete forced himself to open his eyes and _look_. Mikey was biting his lip, his brows creased in wonder.

“Okay?” Pete managed to get out, his voice breaking.

Mikey opened his eyes and smiled at Pete. “You feel so fucking good,” he moaned, rubbing at Pete’s chest.

“I need to…”

“Yeah,” Mikey encouraged, letting his hands fall onto the bed. “Come on.”

Pete wrapped Mikey’s legs around his waist and shifted forward, seizing the opportunity to kiss his way from Mikey’s collarbone up to his lips.

Pete rocked his hips, not quite moving just yet. Mikey gasped and pushed back against him. Pete raised himself onto his elbows and pulled out, before thrusting back in. It made Mikey grasp his shoulders and moan quietly.

“It’s good,” he mumbled against Pete’s neck.

‘You just wait,’ Pete thought, angling his hips differently. He knew he found what he was looking for when Mikey tightened around him and moaned louder than before.

“Fuck, Pete,” he gasped. “I’ve no idea what you’re doing but please don’t stop.”

“Never,” Pete promised, thrusting faster.

Soon enough Mikey was coming undone beneath him, moaning every time Pete moved inside him, his hips working against Pete’s.

And Pete was shifting again, sitting back on his heels and pulling Mikey into his lap. The leverage allowed him to thrust faster and harder, getting Mikey’s prostate dead-on each time.

“Close,” Mikey gasped, his hands flying to Pete’s ass, pushing him in even deeper. “So fucking close.”

“Come on, baby. Fuck, think you could cum just from this?”

Mikey didn’t even hesitate before nodding his head ‘yes’.

“Pete,” Mikey whined, hands grasping at the covers and finding Pete’s hand. Pete laced their fingers together, awed at how beautiful Mikey looked in that moment, coming apart underneath him. “Gonna…” He cut himself off with a loud moan, bordering on a whimper.

“So pretty,” Pete whispered and it was all it took. Mikey was tightening around him, his whole body tense, as he shot all over himself.

“Mikey,” Pete moaned, his hips moving erratically now, a steady stream of ‘fuck, fuck, fuck’ spilling from his lips.

“Come on,” Mikey encouraged, rubbing Pete’s hip gently. “I want you to cum inside me.”

Pete managed to get one more thrust in and then he was cumming, filling Mikey up.

He fell on top of Mikey, his head on Mikey’s chest. He felt Mikey’s fingers in his hair and he was thankful for something to ground him.

He pulled out, when Mikey started shifting underneath him, visibly uncomfortable. If Pete could get hard again so soon after the orgasm, the sight of his seed running down Mikey’s ass and staining the sheets would be more than enough to get him going again. He couldn’t stop himself from pushing two fingers inside, Mikey loose and wet around his fingers.

Mikey whined, overstimulated, but pushed down on Pete’s hand anyway.

“You’re leaking,” Pete muttered in wonder. “It’s hot.”

“Keep doing that and I’ll get hard again,” Mikey warned, but there was no fire behind it.

“That wouldn’t be so bad,” Pete smiled.

He had four fingers inside Mikey, when an image flashed through his brain. “Think you could take it?” He asked, rubbing his thumb on Mikey’s rim to show him what he meant.

Mikey nodded his head, “I know I could.”

Pete bit his lip, feeling warmth pooling low in his stomach.  

Mikey’s cock was filling up again and Pete just _had to_ lean down and lick it. “You know, I never actually got around to repaying the favor,” Pete mumbled against Mikey’s hip,pulling his fingers out.

“At this rate, you’ll get the opportunity in about five minutes,” laughed Mikey.

Pete hummed happily, nipping at Mikey’s hipbone. “Would you fuck me?” Pete asked, surprised at the sudden realization that he wanted it.

“I’ll do whatever you want, but later. I’ll fuck you or let you fist me or you’ll blow me. But now come here,” Mikey promised, reaching for Pete.

Pete lied on top of him, mindless of the mess and let himself be pulled into a kiss. “We should probably get cleaned up,” he said, reluctantly breaking the kiss and getting up from the bed.

He disappeared into the bathroom for a minute, returning with a wet washcloth, which he used to clean Mikey up.

“I vote we use the other bed for actual sleeping,” Mikey suggested.

“Won’t Gerard mind?” Pete asked, as they both shuffled around, so that they weren’t lying in the wet spot.

“Do you honestly believe he’s gonna be sleeping here? Like at all?” Mikey raised an eyebrow.

“Point taken,” Pete chuckled.

They lay down on their sides, facing each other.

“So,” Mikey started, caressing Pete’s arm. “We’re gonna talk now.”

“Can’t we just get some sleep then get back to what we were doing?” Pete asked, hiding his face in Mikey’s neck.

“Sorry.”

“No, you’re not.”

It was silent for a moment, but then Pete moved back, tangling their legs together instead.

“Alright,” he sighed in defeat. “Let’s talk.”

“Why didn’t you talk to Patrick?” Mikey asked, reaching for Pete’s hand and rubbing small circles on the back of it.

“He’s avoiding me,” Pete explained, slightly more defensively than he wanted to.

“He couldn’t have avoided you on the bus earlier today. You had the perfect opportunity…”

“Maybe I did,” Pete cut in angrily. “But what the hell am I supposed to talk to him about?”

Mikey seemed unfazed by Pete’s outburst, only giving Pete’s hand a squeeze as if to comfort him. “The reason why you’re avoiding each other would do for starter.”

Pete closed his eyes and moved in closer, so that he could hide his face in Mikey’s neck. Mikey wrapped his arms around Pete obligingly, rubbing his back.

“Patrick never acts like that without a reason,” Pete mumbled, voice muffled by Mikey’s skin. “But I’ve no idea what I did to piss him off.  So how can I make it better if I don’t know what it is I’m supposed to be making better? I just want him back.”

Mikey’s hands paused halfway up Pete’s back for a second before moving again. “Pete?” He asked softly, sounding slightly nervous.

“Hmm?”

“Are you… Are you in love with him?” Mikey asked and Pete tensed up immediately. “Guess that’s a yes.”

Pete sat up so quickly, he might have pulled something. “Look, it doesn’t mean… It’s not like… I still like you,” he finished miserably. “You’ve gotta believe me. I’m not just using you as…”

“Pete,” Mikey was saying, shaking Pete by his shoulders. “Pete, I know. I understand. Alright?” He asked, pulling Pete to his chest. “But if you _are_ in love with him, you really need to talk to him. Or else you might never speak to each other again.”

“Mikey?” Pete started after a moment. “It’s weird.”

“What is?”

“That _you_ of all people are telling me to go to the guy I might be in love with. I mean, why? Wouldn’t you rather let it be and have me all to yourself?”

Mikey sighed, tightening the hold he had on Pete. “You’re miserable without him. Why would I want _that_? And… fuck, it’ll sound fucking cheesy but… I want you to be happy. Whether it involves me or not.”

Pete’s heart sped up and a soft grin spread on his face. “I think that’s the nicest thing anyone ever said to me.” Pete shifted, so that he could kiss Mikey. “Just one thing,” he whispered against Mikey’s lips. “It’ll always involve you. ‘Cause now I’d be miserable without you too, just as I am without Patrick.”

Mikey smiled softly, almost shyly and Pete could see him blush.

“So, now that we’ve talked,” Pete smirked devilishly, breaking the weird mood that suddenly filled the room, “can we get back to sex?”

Mikey chuckled quietly. “Whatever you want,” he confirmed.

 

***

 

When Pete woke up, it was still (relatively) early. He sighed contentedly, nuzzling Mikey’s chest, which prompted a giggle from the latter.

“Morning,” Mikey whispered, carding his fingers through Pete’s hair. “Slept well?”

“Better than ever,” Pete answered. And it was true. There were no nightmares to speak of, he didn’t wake up even once, and he actually felt rested. “I think I might just want to sleep with you every night for the rest of my life,” Pete said. It took his sleep-hazy brain a couple of seconds to process the words and realize they might have more meaning behind them than ‘you’re the best pillow in the world’ or some shit like that. Pete was surprised to find that he didn’t really care if Mikey understood them as a typically-Pete-remark or if instead he would focus on the ‘rest of their lives’ aspect and what it could imply. As it was, both were true.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Mikey said, kissing the top of Pete’s head. “By the way, you’ve got a ton of unread messages.”

“What?” Pete asked, turning his head, so that he could see Mikey’s face without having to change their position. “Who from?”

“Well, how should I know? I only wanted to check the time.”

Pete looked at the nightstand, where he left his phone several hours earlier. It seemed too far away and Pete really didn’t want to move, so he just shrugged and planted a kiss on Mikey’s chest.

MIkey rolled his eyes at Pete. “Here,” he said, passing him the phone. “How do you ever get anything done? You’re so lazy.”

Pete shrugged again, smiling against Mikey’s skin.

 

**11: 07 pm**

**From: Trick XO**

**Sorry I avoided you.**

 

**11:16 pm**

**From: Trick XO**

**I think I’m drunk.**

 

**11:23 pm**

**From: Trick XO**

**Are you ignoring me?**

 

**11:27 pm**

**From: Trick XO**

**No. You’re probably with Mikey.**

 

**11:28 pm**

**From: Trick XO**

**You’d never ignore me. You’re too nice for that.**

 

**12:01 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**I’m a shitty friend. I don’t even deserve to be called that.**

 

**12:17 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**I mean, I’m messed up, so I decided not to talk to you. ‘Cause I was afraid I’d do something stupid.**

 

**12:23 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**Didn’t really work out, though.**

 

**12:25 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**I wish I could just stay away from you! Forget you even exist.**

 

**12:54 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**I hope you and Mikey are having fun. I like him now. He’s good for you.**

 

**1:04 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**I wouldn’t though. Never. I don’t even want to.**

 

**1:05 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**Forget about you, I mean.**

 

**5:03 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**We’re fucked up and I don’t know how to fix it.**

 

**5:05 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**Tell me how to fix it?**

 

**5:10 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**I miss you so fucking much.**

 

**5:18 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**I tried to get over my shit, but I can’t.**

 

**5:20 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**Please, don’t hate me for it.**

 

**5:36 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**I wanna fall asleep and just forget everything. Is that how you feel most of the time?**

 

**5:37 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**Is that how you felt in February?**

 

**5:40 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**You haven’t snuck into my bed since the first week of Warped.**

 

**5:41 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**I wish you would…**

 

**5:47 am**

**From: Trick XO**

**Where do you keep all those pills? I can’t find any.**

 

**6:34 am**

**From: SEX GOD (you honestly need to think of a better password, took me less than a minute - frnk)**

**if patrick decided to text you some drunken shit yesterday/today (lead singers tend to do that), hes throwing up in our bathroom but relatively unharmed. dont worry abt it, well have him sleep it off then send him back to u.**

 

**7:00 am**

**From: SEX GOD (you honestly need to think of a better password, took me less than a minute - frnk)**

**srsly, tho**

**i know youre worrying (been there, done that, hoping to never repeat it again) but hell be fine. so stop freaking out or ill come and kick your ass :)**

 

“What’s wrong?” Mikey asked, watching Pete with a growing sense of unease. “You look as if somebody died.”

“Well, for a moment there, I thought somebody did,” Pete replied, feeling sick to the stomach, his heart pounding in his chest. As if that wasn’t enough, his head was spinning and he felt dizzy.

“Are you having a panic attack?” Mikey asked, reaching out to touch Pete’s shoulder but then thought better of it.

Pete shook his head then reconsidered and shrugged.

 

**9:10 am**

**To: SEX GOD (you honestly need to think of a better password, took me less than a minute - frnk)**

**thnks. ill pay u bck. u sure u dont wnt me to come ovr?**

 

**9:12 am**

**From: SEX GOD (you honestly need to think of a better password, took me less than a minute - frnk)**

**positive. hes asleep anyway. and dont mention it, its alright :)**

 

“Thank God for Frank Iero,” Pete muttered.

Mikey looked at him questioningly. “Wanna tell me what happened?” He asked, holding Pete close and lying back on the bed.

Pete shrugged. “Trick got drunk. He texted me some pretty messed up shit. Somehow he ended up in Frank’s room. They’re taking care of him.”

“What level of messed up shit are we talking?”

“He said that he misses me and that he doesn’t know how to fix it. And that… You know what, just read it,” Pete finished, shoving his phone at Mikey’s chest.

Suddenly Pete remembered something. “There’s that one thing,” he told Mikey, who was scrolling down, his eyebrows rising higher and higher up his forehead as he read.

“What is it?”

“Well, he said that he liked you _now_. As in ‘I didn’t use to like him but I do now’? Or was it just a particle and he didn’t mean anything by it?”

“Pete…” Mikey said slowly, handing him his phone back.

“Yes, I know,” Pete nodded with a sigh. “I’ll talk to him. As soon as he’s coherent enough.”

 

***

 

**01:16 pm**

**From: SEX GOD (you honestly need to think of a better password, took me less than a minute - frnk)**

**one sobered-up lead singer delivered ;)**

 

“You’re… you’re a lifesaver,” Pete exclaimed as soon as the door clicked shut behind him.

Frank was sitting on one of the beds, phone in hand. “Let’s agree that you owe me a blowjob,” he winked at Pete.

“You’ve got it,” Pete grinned, sitting down on the other bed. “Although I’m not quite sure how it’d come down with Mikey and Gerard.”

“Well, foursome sounds good,” Frank laughed. “But don’t tell Gerard I said that.”

Frank got up, walking over to the door. “Patrick’s in the shower.”

“How exactly did he end up in your room?” Pete asked curiously.

“Oh, he wanted some pills.”

Pete furrowed his brows. “He was hoping you or Gerard would have some?” Pete asked, raising his brows. “He really must have been smashed.”

“He was.” Frank looked like he wanted to add something else, but then shook his head and settled for, “see you around.”

“Thanks,” Pete repeated just before the door closed.

In that exact moment, Patrick decided to come out of the bathroom.

“Ow,” he exclaimed when he noticed Pete. “Em… I…”

“We’ve gotta talk,” Pete said determinedly, looking straight at Patrick, who was avoiding his eyes. “You know we do,” he added, because he could practically _hear_ Patrick trying to come up with an excuse so that he could get out of this.

Eventually, he sighed in defeat, still looking everywhere but at Pete.

“What do you wanna talk about?” He asked defensively, crossing his arms.

“Us,” Pete didn’t miss the way Patrick winced at the word. “You’ve been avoiding me for more than a week. And I don’t even know what I did to get you this pissed.”

Patrick bit his lip, his eyes flashing with anger. “Do you really wanna know why I’m pissed?” He asked, glaring at Pete. The latter was taken aback by the mixed of emotions visible in Patrick’s eyes. There was anger, sure. But underneath it Pete could see hurt and some stubborn determination.

“Fine, have it your way. But it won’t be pretty,” Patrick warned, his calm voice a stark contrast to his frustrated expression, still not moving from his place at the bathroom door. “I was furious at you because of Mikey.”

“Mikey?” Pete repeated dumbly, feeling protectiveness previously reserved for Patrick and Patrick only rise in his chest. “What does he have to do with anything?”

“Everything,” Patrick answered angrily.

“Wait…” Pete said slowly. He thought back to the first time he and Mikey had sex. “You started avoiding me that night me and Mikey… You said you wanted to talk about something, but when you noticed him you got all,” Pete paused, making a vague gesture which could mean anything, “I don’t know… defensive and shit? Why?”

Patrick grimaced. “Do we really have to do this?” He asked almost pleadingly. “It doesn’t fucking matter.”

“Yeah, of course,” Pete’s voice was dripping with unconcealed sarcasm. “Except that apparently it really fucking does. We haven’t spoken to each other in a week. And I’d really like it if you could maybe enlighten me as to why? Because I’m at my wits’ end!” His voice was rising steadily until he almost shouted the last sentence.

Patrick flinched as if he’d been slapped. “I think it might be better if we just forgot about it. II mean, it’s not like it could change anything now.”

Pete clenched his fist in the bedspread. “‘Cause it worked out so well, didn’t it? I mean, we’re closer than ever. It’s not like we have some issues the size of a fucking Mount Everest to work out.”

“Pete…” Patrick tried, all the anger long gone, replaced with sadness.

“So, for the last time, are you going to tell me what the fuck is wrong with you, so that we can start acting like civilized people again, or would you rather we just went back to pretending we don’t know each other?”

Pete was seething with anger, and he couldn’t help it. Until that moment he didn’t realize just how frustrated he was. But in that room, finally getting the opportunity to talk to Patrick, feeling that he was getting absolutely fucking nowhere, all his irritation found an outlet. He was prepared to do everything it took just so they could go back to being best friends again, but Patrick was making it impossible for him to even try.

Patrick, on his part, was shaking slightly, curled in on himself. Suddenly, he straightened up, glaring at Pete.

“You want the truth? Fine. But remember you fucking asked for it,” he raised his voice, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. “I’m fucking in love with you, that’s what’s wrong.”

Pete couldn’t help it, he burst out laughing. It sounded desperate even to him, but he was way past caring.

Patrick seemed thrown off by his reaction but recovered quickly. “And I was going to tell you, but then you found Mikey fucking Way and apparently decided that…”

“Shut up!” Pete shouted before Patrick could finish the sentence. “Just shut the fuck up!”

He rocked forward on the bed, hiding his head between his knees. “You’re not doing this to me,” he mumbled. “I’m not letting you do this to me.”

Before he came here, he was afraid that if Mikey’s suppositions turned out to be true, Pete would break. He thought he wouldn’t be able to stop himself. Patrick was probably the most important person in his life, he’d take a fucking bullet for the kid, and Pete was too frightened to even _begin_ to imagine what it would be like if he suddenly disappeared. No more than a month ago - God, a couple of weeks ago even - such a confession would have Pete jumping in head first, consequences be damned.

But in that moment all Pete could see when he closed his eyes was Mikey. The way he laughed at Pete’s jokes, how his face lit up when Pete confessed he might be in love with him, what he looked like when he came. He could imagine the look on Mikey’s face if Pete ran off with Patrick. Mikey would understand. Of course, he would. No matter how much Pete broke his heart. He might even give him a pat on the back and wish them both luck. And that made it even worse.

“I need to go,” he said so suddenly, Patrick jumped.

“Pete…”

“No. It’s just… no. I’ve gotta calm down,” Pete reached for the door knob. “I’ll see you later.”

He glanced at Patrick before he closed the door. He was still standing in the same place he was, a dejected look on his face that made Pete’s heart break just that little bit more.

Mikey gave him a key to his room earlier, so Pete let himself in. He took off his shoes and laid back against the pillow, closing his eyes, trying to make sense of the chaos in his head. Mikey was in the bathroom, taking a shower. The sound of running water combined with Mikey’s quiet singing calmed Pete down enough to make him take his phone out of his pocket and scroll through his contacts until he found Patrick’s number.

 

**2:02 pm**

**To: Trick XO**

**hope u knw tht no  mttr wht ull always b my bst frnd**

 

**2:03 pm**

**From: Trick XO**

**Don’t worry. I know :)**

 

**2:05 pm**

**From: Trick XO**

**We’ll be alright?**

 

**2:05 pm**

**To: Trick XO**

**we mst b. i cldnt live w/o u**

 

Pete decided that it was sappy enough to stop at. Apparently Patrick came to the same conclusion, because he didn’t text back.

“You’re here,” Mikey said, coming to stand at the foot of the bed. Pete couldn’t help getting distracted by the droplets of water dripping from his hair onto his chest and the towel that was sliding from his hips, exposing a trail of hair leading down to his groin.

“You sound surprised.”

Mikey shrugged and looked down, kicking at his suitcase, which was lying on the floor. “I am. Did you talk to Patrick?” He asked, looking up so quickly, Pete was surprised he didn’t break his neck.

“Yeah.”

Mikey raised an eyebrow, sliding in next to him, when Pete shuffled over. “And…?”

Pete lay on his side, reaching up to run a finger up Mikey’s neck into his hair. “He’s in love with me.”

Mikey hummed as if he was trying to figure something out. “Right,” he seemed to come to some sort of conclusion and Pete could feel his body tense up as if he was preparing himself for something unpleasant. “Let’s get this over with, then,” he sighed, sinking further into the pillow.

Pete let his hand fall from Mikey’s hair. “What?” He asked.

“Come on, Pete. I get it,” Mikey mumbled emotionlessly.

“Mikey, could you please start making sense? I’ve no idea what you’re on about.”

“You don’t have to let me down gently, you know. I’m not gonna break.”

“Mikey,” Pete sighed, his heart suddenly too big for his chest. He understood what Mikey meant and it made him want to cuddle him so hard, he could hardly breathe. Instead he threw one leg over Mikey’s thighs and climbed on top of him. “You idiot.”

Mikey widened his eyes, whether at the warm body suddenly occupying his lap or the fond insult, Pete wasn’t sure.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Pete assured him, wrapping his arms around Mikey’s neck and resting his forehead against Mikey’s. “Did you honestly expect me to leave?”

“Well… yes,” Mikey sputtered, still looking unconvinced.

“Can’t say I blame you,” Pete admitted, remembering how he thought the same thing.

“Do you mean it? That you’re not leaving?” Mikey asked and his eyes twinkled hopefully.

“Do you want me to?”

“Fuck no!” Mikey exclaimed fiercely.

Pete laughed. “Then I’m afraid you’re stuck with me.”

“That’s terrible,” Mikey said,  grinning brightly, his eyes sparkling and Pete just had to lean in and kiss him.

“Are you and Patrick okay though?”

“We will be,” Pete assured him before kissing again.

They made out for a while until Mikey pushed at Pete’s chest to get him to back off a bit. “How do you feel about make-up sex?” He asked with a devious glint in his eyes.

“We haven’t been arguing,” Pete replied mock-innocently.

“Nah, but you and Patrick have been. And since you opted for not having sex with him…” Mikey’s hand wandered under Pete’s shirt and up his back.

“I don’t know,” Pete teased.

“How about if I promised you could do anything you wanted?” Mikey’s whispered in his ear, seizing the opportunity to lick behind it.

“Anything at all?” Pete asked to make sure.

Mikey nodded against Pete’s neck, his mouth too busy giving Pete a hickey for him to answer. Pete’s dick seemed very pleased at the notion. “There is one thing I wanted to do,” Pete confessed, pushing Mikey so that he was flat on his back. He quickly undressed himself and got rid of Mikey’s towel, moving to straddle him again.

Mikey grasped the back of his neck, pulling him in for a kiss. Pete started rocking down into Mikey’s until they were both fully hard.

Mikey whined when Pete kneeled up and Pete just had to lean down and peck the tip of his nose. “Why are you so cute?” He asked, moving down Mikey’s body. He was turned on and he couldn’t be bothered drawing this out.

Mikey tangled his fingers in Pete’s head, letting the strands slide through his fingers.

Pete sucked a mark on the inside of Mikey’s thigh before spreading his legs. He started off with rubbing his lips and tongue against Mikey’s balls. He glanced up to see Mikey leaning back on his elbows, staring down at Pete, his mouth hanging open.

“You’ve no idea how hot you look right now,” Mikey said and Pete grinned.

Pete licked a broad stipe up his cock, circling the tip with his tongue before sitting up straight.

“Turn over for me?” He asked and Mikey complied immediately, rolling onto his stomach, but he couldn’t resist looking over his shoulder at Pete.

Pete moved back up, covering Mikey’s body with his own, his cock fitting itself in between Mikey’s cheeks. Mikey pushed back against him unconsciously.

Pete started at the nape of his neck and followed the line of Mikey’s spine with wet, open-mouthed kisses.

He paused when he got to Mikey’s ass, biting one cheek and Mikey moaned above him, his hips pressing into the mattress.

“Perfect,” Pete grinned, spreading Mikey’s cheek. Not letting himself overthink it, Pete leant down and pressed his tongue just behind Mikey’s balls, moving all the way up to his lower back.

The whorish groan Mikey let out went straight to Pete’s cock and he let himself thrust against the bed, just once.

“Fuck, Pete.” Mikey was up on his  elbows, looking back at Pete, eyes wide with wonder.

“Come on,” Pete urged, squeezing Mikey’s hips. “On your hands and knees.”

Mikey kneeled up and then moved forward, so that half of his weight was resting on his elbows, his ass high in the air. He spread his legs and Pete groaned at how exposed he looked, happily offering all of himself up to Pete.

“Mikey…”

And then he was moving again, hands on Mikey’s hips, his mouth right over Mikey’s hole. He licked around it and Mikey gasped.

Pete stopped just long enough to mumble “good?” against Mikey’s ass.

“Flippin perfect.”

Pete teased Mikey’s hole with the tip of his tongue, not trying to breach the muscles just yet. Mikey reached beneath himself and squeezed his cock, but Pete batted his hand away.

“Shh, none of that. At least for the time being.”

Mikey whined, pushing back against Pete’s face.

“Please,” he whimpered.

Pete slowly slid his tongue inside, feeling Mikey tense up around him.

“Oh my God, it’s so good… you’re so good,” he was babbling, already too far gone to care.

Pete hummed, his tongue still inside Mikey and Mikey moaned rocking back.

“Fuck.”

Pete pulled back, pushing two of his fingers in instead. “Fuck, Mikey,” he said, awe plain in his voice. “If I’d known how much you’d like this, I’d have done it ages ago.”

Pete curled his fingers against Mikey’s prostate, making him gasp.

Pete slid his tongue inside, along with his two fingers and Mikey was a whimpering mess beneath him. He only seemed able to say one word, which was Pete’s name.

“Close.”

“Come on, touch yourself for me.”

Mikey didn’t need to be told twice, his hand flying to his cock, jerking himself off in time to Pete fingering him.

“You’re so fucking hot. So eager to have something inside you. Bet you’d love me to fuck you again. Just bend you over and shove my cock deep inside you. And then fuck you so hard, you’d be feeling me inside you for weeks.”

Mikey groaned low in his throat, shoving himself back onto Pete’s fingers, and came all over his own fist.

“Fuck,” he gasped, falling forward onto the mattress.

Pete straddled his thighs, fisting his own cock, his hips rocking forward on his own accord. It took him three strokes and then he was coming on the back of Mikey’s thighs and his ass.

Mikey hummed appreciatively. “Not bad, Wentz,” he said teasingly.

“You loved it,” Pete answered, smirking.

“I really did,” Mikey smiled, his eyes soft, and pulled Pete down into a kiss.

 

***

 

Pete was smashed. Like seriously fucking drunk. Some band Pete never heard of before in his life threw a party. Joe went, because apparently those guys were his friends, and Pete just tugged along. It was pretty dull as far as parties go, but there was alcohol, so Pete decided it wasn’t half as bad. He had booze and now all he needed was Mikey.

Unfortunately, My Chem had some problems with their bus, and didn’t arrive yet.

So Pete returned to his own bus.

Patrick turned out to be the only person there. He was lying on the couch, watching some movie.

“Trick,” Pete giggled and Patrick raised an eyebrow at him, but didn’t say anything when Pete climbed over the armrest and squeezed in between the back of the couch and Patrick. “Warm,” he mumbled into Patrick’s neck nosing the skin there. “You smell nice.”

“I haven’t washed properly in over a week,” Patrick answered, sounding somewhere between amused and grossed-out.

“You should not-wash more often,” Pete said seriously.

Patrick had to pause mid-eyeroll as he felt wet tongue on his neck.

“Pete,” he tried for warning tone, but he sounded too breathless for that.

“Tastes good too,” Pete mumbled and moved Patrick’s collar out of the way.

“Pete, get off,” Patrick said but there wasn’t any force in it. Alright, so maybe Pete being all handsy wasn't out of ordinary, especially when he was this drunk. But that didn’t make it any easier on Patrick.

“I am,” Pete answered, his hand sliding down Patrick’s arm and onto his hip.

“What abou-oh!” Patrick gasped in shock, when Pete’s hand slid from his hip to his crotch and squeezed.

Pete had a very vague feeling that he was forgetting something important. Something was nagging him relentlessly, squeezed at the back of his head. Pete tried to focus on it for a second but then he got distracted by the way Patrick’s cock was swelling up in his hand, where he shoved it down the singer’s pants.

He would think about what it was he was forgetting later...

 

***

 

“Please, don’t hate me,” was the first thing Pete said, as soon as he saw Mikey.

Mikey looked at him puzzledly for a brief moment and then Pete saw recognition dawn on his face.

“Ow,” he said. “You slept with Patrick.” It wasn’t a question and it made Pete feel sick. Was Mikey expecting it all along?

“Sorry,” he said poignantly, dropping his gaze, unable to look at Mikey’s face a second longer.

“What happened?” Mikey asked, pulling Pete down into his bunk.

Pete shrugged, biting his lips. “I got drunk,” God, it sounded pathetic even to his own ears. “And then I woke up with Patrick.”

“That’s a bit unfair on him,” Mikey said, frowning.

“That’s…. What?!” Pete spattered. Was Mikey even serious?

“I mean, he’s in love with you. It must suck that you can’t even remember having sex with him.”

Pete blinked at Mikey, incredulous expression on his face. “I cheated on you.”

“I know,” Mikey agreed.

“And what you are worried about is the guy I cheated on you _with_.”

“Well, imagine being in his place,” Mikey said calmly, as if it was obvious. And, yeah, it must have been awful, but Pete couldn’t help feeling that Mikey was missing the point.

“What about us?”

“What about us?” Mikey parroted, furrowing his brows.

Pete shrugged, opened and closed his mouth, then shrugged again.

“Are you breaking up with me?” Mikey asked calmly and Pete was flagerbustered at his complete lack of visible emotional reaction.

“Aren’t _you_ breaking up with _me_? I cheated on you,” Pete sat up so quick, he would have banged his head against the top of the bunk, hadn’t Mikey grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back down.

Mikey sighed tiredly, rubbing at his eyes with the heels of his hand. “Look,” he told Pete, his eyes slightly red. “To be perfectly honest with you, I was kinda expecting it to happen. And don’t think I’m letting you get away with it so easily. But, the point is...” he paused to taking Pete’s hand in his. “The point is that I don’t want you stuck with me when all you really want is Patrick.”

Pete had to swallow a couple of times before the lump in his throat disappeared and his chest didn’t feel so tight anymore. “Mikey,” he whispered, letting go of Mikey’s hand so that he could caress his cheek. “How are you so perfect? I’m not sure I even deserve you. ”

“Do something for me?” Mikey asked, putting his hand on top of Pete’s.

“Anything,” Pete promised.

“There’s a hotel night in a couple of days. Please, take your time to think things through. You can have my room, I’ll stay with the guys. Just think about what _you_ want. You know I’ll understand. And I’m sure Patrick will too. Alright?”

“Yeah,” Pete nodded. “Yeah, of course.”

Mikey kissed his nose before getting out off the bunk and going out, unconcerned that it was, in fact, his bus.

 

***

 

Mikey, true to his word, gave his room up to Pete, and went to share with Gerard and Frank. But Pete kind of wished he hadn’t. As soon as he was alone with his thoughts, he started feeling anxiety coiling uncomfortably in his stomach. He never was really good at actually thinking anything through. He very much prefered to jump into everything head-first.

The big dilemma was, he honestly couldn’t imagine his life without either of them. They were both so fucking important to him, it hurt him to even think about what it would be like if they went away. He had to remind himself to keep breathing, repeating Mikey’s words in his head. They would understand, no matter what Pete decided.

Pete realized just how vital Mikey became to him. He liked from the beginning, sure. But now… Now he felt just as much an integral part of Pete’s life as Patrick. And that meant a lot. Mikey made him feel safe. He understood Pete, maybe even better than Pete understood himself. He would never judge him, no matter how much he fucked up. Pete loved him. And he didn't think he could ever really stop. And it didn't matter that they didn’t know each other all that long. It felt as if they were best friends all their lives.

As for Patrick…

Patrick could save Pete from himself and that was more than anybody could ever do for him. Pete seriously believed that if it wasn’t for Patrick, Pete wouldn’t be here anymore. There were so many times, when just remembering Patrick’s laughter or the gleam in his eyes made everything better. Whenever Pete was at the verge of giving up on himself, he imagined how disappointed Patrick would be and it was enough for the pills to fly out of the window. Losing Patrick would equal ripping Pete’s heart out and jumping on it.

“Fuck,” Pete whispered, staring at the ceiling. “Fuck you both.”

 

***

 

It was raining, although ‘pouring down’ was probably a better description. The sound of rain beating against the window pane, as if it was trying to break it, annoyed Pete and made him feel on edge. It only let up when the sun was beginning to rise, the purplish light seeping in through the half-opened curtains.

 

**3:46 am**

**To: mikeyway**

**come outside?**

 

He barely had time to lock his phone before it beeped, signalling a new message and letting Pete know Mikey apparently couldn’t sleep either. Somehow, it made him feel slightly better.

 

**3:46 am**

**From: mikeyway**

**Brt**

 

When Pete came out, Mikey was already there, leaning against the wall, smoking a cigarette. It wasn’t raining anymore but there were puddles everywhere and there was the smell of wet soil in the air. Pete nodded towards the back of the hotel without saying a word.

As soon as they were alone, Pete took Mikey’s face in his palms and kissed him gently. When they broke apart, Mikey let out a shaky sigh, resting his foreheads against Pete’s.

“I’ll miss you,” he whispered, rubbing his thumb on the skin of Pete’s hip, right above his belt.

“How…?” Pete started in surprise.

Mikey shrugged. "I think we both know how it ends," he didn’t look sad. More wistful maybe, like he had been storing away all those moments to relive them in the form of memories.

Pete nodded, "Guess so."

They both fell silent, but there was something still bugging Pete. So much in fact that he had to bring it up.

"Were we really doomed from the start?" He asked, glaring at the puddle that was soaking through his sneakers. He was afraid of the answer, terrified of Mikey walking out on him. He didn't want it all to be just one big joke. Everything Mikey ever said, everything Pete believed to be true.

Mikey bit his lip and shrugged, raising Pete's chin, so that their eyes had to meet. Pete felt as if Mikey was trying to stare his way into Pete's brain. Eventually, Mikey released Pete's chin in favor of brushing bangs from Pete’s forehead and then stroking his cheek softly.

"Don't ever think I lied to you, okay? I wish you could just realize how wonderful you really are. What I said..." he paused, chewing on his bottom lip, but his eyes never left Pete's, "I meant it. All of it. I loved you." Mikey laughed unhappily. "I still do," his hand fell to his side, as he took several steps back, putting distance between them, which, to Pete, felt like miles. Pete took in the defensively crossed arms and the distant look. "But it doesn't matter anymore. You love him. Anybody can see this."

"It doesn't mean..." Pete started but found himself at the loss for words. Pete gave Mikey a hopeless look. "I loved you, you know? I... Those weren't lies. And even though..." he gave up with a sigh. "Please," he begged, "you've got to believe me."

He suddenly found himself gripping the lapels of Mikey's jacket, closing the distance Mikey had put between them without having made conscious decision to do so.

"Remember that night we first had sex? Gerard had 'a talk' with me later. He warned me that, in the end, you would break my heart, because no matter what, you would always run back to Patrick, whenever he wanted you. He said that it was an instinct, something you do without thinking, because you love him. He wasn't blaming you," Mikey added quickly, when he saw Pete open his mouth. "He told me I shouldn't either. And I don't. You two belong together. He makes you happy."

Mikey smiled wistfully. "If you could see the way you look at him. Like he was the most precious thing. I kinda wish somebody would ever look at me like that." Mikey shrugged. "Oh well, at least I could have this,” he made a vague gesture in Pete’s direction. “Whatever it was.”

Pete was desperately wishing for words to return to him. He had to say something. Mikey was wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. _Wrong._ And Pete was racking his brain for just one poem full of cliches and metaphors. And there was absolutely nothing. Not even one sentence. There was only one word he could remember. All he could focus on.

“Mikey…”

“I told you, it’s alright. We’re friends.”

And there was a fucking smile on Mikey’s face. And fuck if it wasn’t genuine.

“I know,” the smile widened and Pete watched with some kind of yearning how Mikey’s eyes lit up with… _something_. Pete didn’t dare call it love, because he knew he would do something stupid. Like possibly ruin his whole life, the best relationship he ever had (well, not quite a relationship yet, but he would talk to Patrick soon), maybe the band too. Just throw it all to hell and run away somewhere on another continent, marry Mikey, and live happily ever after.

Mikey apparently still possessed the ability to read Pete’s thoughts, because his eyes widened slightly and he bit his lip, as if he was fighting with himself.

“I think it’s my cue to leave,” he said eventually and Pete felt his heart break a bit more. “Bye, Petey. I’ll see you around.”

 

***

 

Pete missed Mikey more than he imagined he would. They didn’t lose contact, but texting and the sporadic phone calls couldn’t really fill the empty place in his heart Mikey left behind. Still, at least Mikey really meant it when he said they were friends. And having Patrick was almost enough to make Pete completely forget about the pain.

It felt glorious, being able to wake up in the morning to Patrick snuggled into his side. Pete would probably never stop being amazed that he could touch all the skin or kiss Patrick whenever he wanted, without having to disguise it as his usual friendliness. But Pete’s favourite part was probably how, now, whenever he said ‘I love you’, Patrick would say the same to him.

 

**10:12 am**

**From: mikeyway**

**Gerard just called. He seems to have mixed feelings about your new album ;)**

**Btw, I <3 it**

 

**10:15 am**

**To: mikeyway**

**u can rmnd him tht trck wll hv to sing bout his bf’s ex every nght fr at least 1 yr. thatll cheer him up :D**

**i thght u mght ;)**

 

**10: 20 am**

**From: mikeyway**

**Just one thing. ‘Bang the Doldrums’? I mean, dude, you’re like the least subtle person on this planet.**

 

**10:22 am**

**To: mikeyway**

**wld u prfr th wrkng ttl?**

 

**10:23 am**

**From: mikeyway**

**I have a feeling I’ll regret asking, but... What was it?**

 

**10:23 am**

**To: mikeyway**

**Bang Mikey Way**

 

**10:24 am**

**From: mikeyway**

**No, it wasn’t!**

 

**10:25 am**

**To: mikeyway**

**hw bout summer of heartaches**

 

**10:26 am**

**From: mikeyway**

**IDK…**

**I mean, for me it’ll always be the summer of love**

 

**10:27 am**

**To: mikeyway**

**Summer of like snds bttr**

 

**10:29 am**

**From: mikeyway**

**I’ll give you that one :p**

**You’re gonna write me another song?**

 

**10:32 am**

**To: mikeyway**

**every sng ill write frm nw on will b bout u. jst wait n c XO**

 

Patrick emerged from the bedroom, rubbing at his eyes and pouting and Pete just had to grin.

“You’ve got some major bed head going on,” Pete said as Patrick settled in his lap.

“Are you going somewhere?” Patrick asked when he noticed Pete was fully clothed, complete with his shoes and jacket.

“I’m visiting my parents.” Pete bit his lip, suddenly anxious. “Thought that maybe you’d come with me? Guess, it’d be better if we did it together.”

“Did what together?” Patrick asked curiously, all sleepiness gone.

“Told them that we’re… well - together,” Pete chuckled nervously.

Patrick blinked at him before grabbing Pete by the collar and kissing him until they were both breathless.

And Pete thought that, for the first time in his life, everything seemed to be working out more than perfectly.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm actually thinking about a sequel for this. Eventually. As in, I have a rough outline in my head that I might actually get round to writing sometime this decade.


End file.
